Thursday, December 30, 2010

Christmas past

Today there is bright sun. I love the sun, and sunlight and daylight. There isn't much of it in Syracuse in the winter, so you have to cherish it when it shows up.

My birthday, December 22, is the winter solstice. This means that after my birthday, everything starts to get better; we are on the right side of the calendar; the days lengthen rather than shorten.

My birthday is generally the low point of the year, every year. I survive that (not gracefully, usually), and then we get through Christmas, which is tough, but not as tough as my birthday.

December 26 dawns with a new hope. I always feel so much better on December 26. It might be my favorite day of the year: the day when everything is over, and we have made it, and we can relax, rest, play our new games, read our new books and watch our new movies.

Today is not yet New Year's Eve. December 30, a no-man's-land of a date smack in the middle of the week that falls off the edge of the world every year. Today I will try to take a walk, appreciate the sun, eat healthy food and settle year-end money issues.

It was a tough year. There are a lot of things that happened this year that I was unable to share in the context of this blog, but yet things that our family will remember forever: among them, the tumultuous end to our vacation at the beach and the issues that precipitated it which have not yet been fully resolved.

You should never say, "Things can't get any worse," because they always can, and once you've said that, they always do.

Right now, at the end of 2010, I feel like I am poised on the edge of a knife. Things could get worse, or they could get better. This year will almost certainly bring great changes, and I don't like changes.

Ordinarily, at this point in the year, I am thinking about how best to pack away Christmas, making sure we have sparkling grape juice and ingredients for nachos to enjoy on New Year's Eve. Ordinarily, by now I am relaxed and ready for a fresh but uneventful "new start." Getting a new date book and starting to use it, that is a change I can handle. Getting ready to sell my house, not so much.

Dear Lord God,

Please give us guidance for the coming year. Please, in Your mercy and compassion, let it be a better year than last year. Please help me to be thankful for the many blessings you do bestow and to be patient and trusting about the blessings I want but don't feel I am receiving. Please help me to cherish Your constant and abiding presence with me.

Please answer some questions, direct our paths and provide for us according to Your will and purpose.

Please grant us health, especially David.

Please be our greatest treasure, and use us for Your Kingdom.


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